News at a Glance

By Sarah Masker
Copy Editor

1.)  Cats are for cuddling, not for eating. 36-year-old Jason Louis Wilmert, however, doesn’t seem to understand that.  Neighbors called the sheriff when they heard cats screeching and wailing from Wilmert’s house, and investigators found evidence that led them to believe “he had the intent to use a cat for food.”  Sheriff’s spokesman Ray Pruitt was unable to comment directly on the evidence, but said he has “never seen anything like this.”  Cats around the world can sleep easy tonight; Wilmert is currently being held in jail for charges of animal cruelty and using a pet or domesticated animal for food.  Some people and their diets….

2.)  If Mother Nature ever decides to chill out, this could be you.  A 45-year-old man from Sweden was recently dug out from his snow-buried car after he survived there for two months without food.  The man, who says he had been in the car since December 19, was emaciated and extremely weak.  The temperature in the area recently dropped to minus 22 F, and when snowmobilers finally dug him out they found him in the back seat in a sleeping bag.  Physician Stefan Branth said the man probably survived by going into a dormant-like state, “A bit like a bear that hibernates.  Humans can do that.”  Oh, the things the human body can do.

3.)  For a flightless bird, an emu in Vermont is proving to be very difficult to get ahold of.  The 150-pound bird, which looks like a small ostrich, has been wandering around Grand Isle and South Hero since it escaped from a local farm five weeks ago.  The bird is such an escape artist, it managed to break free when an elementary school worker, Steve Berard, tried to lasso it with an extension cord.  The emu’s owner, who bought the elusive bird and two others for his grandchildren, says they don’t make great pets.  No kidding.  An ad in the local newspaper says, “Free emu if you can capture it.”

4.)  It was a birthday to remember for Mary Kantorowski.  Not only did she turn 98, but her son evicted her from the home where she lived for 60 years.  Peter Kantorowski wanted his mother to move into a nursing home or live with him, but when Mary refused, he ended up obtaining a court-ordered eviction.  71-year-old Peter is concerned about his mother’s well-being, but Mary says she won’t leave the house where she raised her children and cooked for the church that she attended on a daily basis.  Her late husband wanted her to live in the small yellow house until she died, and Mary says that the house is her “everything.”  The mother and son will go to court next month to resolve the family feud.

5.)  Smoking has its risks, but the man who was using electric cigarettes to help him quit probably didn’t expect to end up in the hospital’s burn unit.  As the man was smoking Monday night, the cigarette’s battery exploded, burning the man’s face and knocking out some of his teeth.  He also lost part of his tongue.  North Bay Fire Department Chief Joseph Parker likened the explosion to a bottle rocket going off in the man’s mouth.  Maybe electricity isn’t the answer to the world’s problems after all.

6.)  If everyone who has ever been tagged in an embarrassing photo on Facebook filed a lawsuit against whoever posted the offending picture, law firms around the world wouldn’t have time for anything else.  Minneapolis resident Eric Olsen got angry after his uncle, Randall LaBrie, posted childhood pictures of Olsen with accompanying snarky comments.  He sued his uncle for harassment, but lost the case and an appeal to a higher court.  This just made future family dinners way more interesting.

7.)  Discretion is kind of key when role-playing on Valentine’s Day.  When police in Portland received calls about a naked woman tied up with duct tape in the backseat of a car, more than nine police cars responded.  31-year-old Nikolas Alexander Harbar and 26-year-old Stephanie Morgan Pelzner claimed they were simply role-playing, but were arrested for disorderly conduct in the second degree.  Hey, it’s not like their actions were really that innocent.

8.)  Anyone who has ever sat next to a crying child on an airplane understands the singular torment of the experience, but no amount of screaming justifies using the emergency exit.  A mom who wanted a quick getaway asked the man next to her for help, and once the plane landed on the tarmac in Vietnam, 29-year-old Le Van Thuan opened the door, triggering the escape slide so that the mom and child could exit faster.  The man will be fined up to $950, and it will cost $10,000 to refit the slide.  Flying is getting so expensive these days!

9.)  In a very snake-like move, a tasselled wobbegong shark was caught swallowing a bamboo shark in the Great Barrier Reef.  Wobbegongs have jaws that can dislocate, as well as rearward-pointing teeth that allow them to grasp large prey before swallowing it whole.  Daniela Ceccarelli of the Australian Research Council Centre of Excellence for Coral Reef Studies said that “witnessing predation events like this is very rare.”  In other words, thanks for having a meal right when the humans with the camera swam by.

10.)  Nik Wallenda was “thrilled to death” to learn that Canada’s Niagara Parks Commission granted him permission to walk over Niagara Falls on a 1,800-foot tightrope.  The daredevil was finally given permission as the commission hopes to establish a tradition of considering requests for these stunts once every twenty years, and only from professionals.  Wallenda will not wear a harness, but will carry a safety belt that he could hook to the 2-inch cable if he fell.  A rescue helicopter will be prepared to pluck him from the water if he takes an unplanned dip.

One thought on “News at a Glance

  1. I don’t know about that. What about the Nintendo wii console? It had 5 years to manage the graphics, and it couldn’t even run games often first Xbox. How the heck does that happen to be?

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