Just a Gander; Thoughts on First Dates

By Amanda Gabriel
Senior Writer

A first date is a topic that many people stress over, especially since in today’s world people tend to either skip the first date entirely or go out with someone they have only met online. Personally, I have never tried online dating because I believe that a personal connection is lost through technology and one can misinterpret others or get the wrong idea. This can lead to an even more stressful first encounter, making a first date that much more awkward. Because of our generation’s tendency to use a screen to connect with someone, as well as the hookup culture, the classic romantic first date is disappearing.

In my opinion, people are putting less effort into and less emphasis on these first impressions. The typical first date has turned into meeting up for a coffee or watching Netflix. Where has our creativity and sense of romance gone? Perhaps it is better to be in a more laid back atmosphere because it takes away some of the stress of planning an elaborate get together, but what you choose to show the other person when you meet him or her for the first time is crucial.

I am not saying to not be yourself, or to pretend to be something that you are not, and many people do put a lot of effort into how they dress or what they say on a first date; however, planning something more special, like choosing a nice restaurant or going out to the movies instead of staying in, shows the other person you are serious.

Maybe that is the problem with our generation—more of what we do seems to hold less weight, and we do not fully commit to anything out of fear. If we don’t fully commit, how can we put everything into a first date? So people turn to other tips and tricks, the do’s and don’ts of first dates, the “art of pickup” to persuade the other person that you are worth the time. Yet what you do and show the other person is much more important than words.

Some may argue that you can’t fully commit without knowing the other person, which is a consequence of meeting online. We need to be less timid, be less concerned about saying just the right words, and just show the other person who you are.

There will always be general “dos” that apply to a first date, such as not stressing, being on time, and not using your phone, but to me these are more general answers. There are no strict rules to a first date. Be adventurous and try something unexpected, because a first date is never as structured as a well thought out response through text.

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