April Fool’s Issue: Weekly Driftwood

Inaugural WC Hype House encourages its tenants to “bust it down”

By Obi Megwan Kenobi Public Relations Consultant for the Jedi Order Move over Charli D’amelio, TikTok…

“In Gus we trust”: how to make your own Gus the Goose costume

By Gossip Goose  Chief Investigative Fashion Expert  Feeling at home on campus is difficult in a…

Chestertown offers post-COVID-19 classes to teach residents how to be human again

By Goose II: The Reckoning   Professional Human  (Not a bunch of geese in a trench coat) …

WC presidential search committee will model selection process after ABC’s “The Bachelor”

By Jazzy Jones Hamilton Actress This year’s presidential search is filled with twists, turns, and drama. …

SEB “Netflix and Chill” event falls flat, WC students take action

By Chillaxin’ Jackson Student Watch Party Writer After a month of planning, three Washington College students…

Despite concerns, campus squirrel show must go on

By Darlene Paranoia Campus Rodentologist In the absence of activity on the Washington College campus, the…

Presidential Search Committee delves into ancient temple in search of permanent president

By Suspicious Fish Under the Sea Correspondent Finding a permanent president to lead the Washington College…

Joseph R. Biden is just an okay name for a president

By Gossip Goose Chief Investigative Skeptic On Jan. 20, a new United States president was sworn…

WC student creates dream travel destination list for after COVID-19

By Basically Ariana Grande 5’3 Isn’t That Short For over a year now, students have been…