By Big Bird
Sesame Street Resident
Last week, President of the College Dr. Mike Sosulski officially announced that Gus the Goose’s daughter, GooseGoose, will take over as the new school mascot. However, this immediate transition stirred much debate over Gus’s qualifications.
Gus the Goose, a direct descendant of the first Chestertown goose who befriended George Washington, represents the school’s legacy.
The goose worked on numerous esteemed projects, including working with NASA to establish a Mars rover in WC’s name, securing funds from former President Barack Obama to improve the school, and inventing the viral dance the griddy.
“Gus has shown the spirit and enthusiasm of any great upcoming figurehead, and if I could pick a successor for President, I would pick him. It’s because of Gus I have felt the obligation to grant Washington College two million dollars,” Obama said in a 2012 interview.
Gus overextended himself for the sake of the College, and because of this, the immediate suggestion of GooseGoose as his predecessor raised some concerns about her ability to perform the job.
GooseGoose rose to stardom from the moment of her highly-publicized birth. While her mother, Yolarkin Honkdid, took a step back from the spotlight during GooseGoose’s childhood, GooseGoose herself spent her adolescence as a socialite in Los Angeles and New York City, causing some to wonder why she would choose to represent Chestertown.
Important figureheads who worked with Gus attest to GooseGoose’s talent.
“It’s only natural that Goosegoose would provide for the school the same as Gus, and we should treat her with that same admiration and celebration,” Obama said.
“If Gus can create something as inspirational as the griddy, then there is no doubt that GooseGoose has the skills to do the same. I think I’ll try to recruit her to my studio,” Abby Lee Miller of the Abby Lee Miller Dance Company said.
After the announcement, however, Twitter went wild with their distaste for GooseGoose.
“They should find someone with actual talent and who has actually accomplished something other than being born to represent Washington College,” Twitter user @gusgang said.
“Big Bird has made great strides towards fixing climate change, surely someone like him would be a more suitable a candidate and deserving of greater admiration,” said Twitter user @thisiswac.
This internet uproar found its way into administrative debates over the logistics of GooseGoose’s implementation. Currently, Director of Student Engagement Antoine Jordan is looking to postpone the replacement of Gus the Goose until the situation settles.
GooseGoose acknowledged that she wants what is best for the campus. Whether that means taking on the role or pursuing a career as a Muppet, she is looking out for the greater good.
“Honk honk,” GooseGoose said, solidifying the idea that she does not want the role simply for her fame, but rather for the good she can do for the community.
The replacement of Gus the Goose is now a work in progress, but WC is expected to make an official statement on the matter next week.
Credit: Photo courtesy of UR MOM
Caption: GooseGoose Honkdid is a fashion icon in her own right. In 2016, the socialite signed with IMG models, becoming the first bird model in the industry.